Back to Basics: Have you thought about writing an essay-type memoir?

 

The memoir you want to write will be packed with rich material for your family, friends, and maybe even strangers—after all, your story is important—

 

but to impact readers,

you must help them understand your story—

even  more than that,

you want them to enjoy and benefit from reading your story.

 

That’s why you need to structure—to arrange—your memoir carefully.

 

Richard Gilbert writes that memoirists must “focus not just on the story they want to tell but on how best to present it.”

 

Charlotte Rains Dixon explains the importance of structure this way:

 

“A piece of creative writing without structure

is like bread without yeast. Or a pen without ink.

Or coffee without caffeine in it.

 

“Picture a clothesline with a string between the two poles

all loose and wavy. No way can you hang clothes on it.

Now think of that same string as pulled taut,

and it accepts your shirts and shorts and underwear just fine.

Structure allows your [story’s] scenes

and characters and plot points to hang on.

Otherwise, they are just dangling in the wind.”

 

Last week we began looking at how to structure your memoir. (Click on Are you paralyzed by the thought of writing your memoir?) We looked at one option—arranging it chronologically.

 

But not all memoirists write their stories chronologically. Today let’s look at writing an essay-style memoir—a compilation of stand-alone essays.

 

For an essay-type memoir, you could use a poem to establish your structure.

 

While you read the poem below, notice: Each line could be a separate chapter in which you tell readers what you’ve experienced or what you’ve watched someone else do, and how you, the memoirist, changed as a result:

 

“If: A Father’s Advice to His Son”

 

If you can keep your head when all about you

Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,

If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,

But make allowance for their doubting too;

If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,

Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies,

Or being hated, don’t give way to hating,

And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise;

 

If you can dream—and not make dreams your master;

If you can think—and not make thoughts your aim;

If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster

And treat those two impostors just the same;

If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken

Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,

Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,

And stoop and build ’em up with worn-out tools;

 

If you can make one heap of all your winnings

And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,

And lose, and start again at your beginnings,

And never breathe a word about your loss;

If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew

To serve your turn long after they are gone,

And so hold on when there is nothing in you

Except the will which says to them: ‘Hold on!’

 

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,

Or walk with Kings—nor lose the common touch,

If neither foes nor living friends can hurt you,

If all men count with you, but none too much;

If you can fill the unforgiving minute

With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run,

Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,

And—which is more—you’ll be a Man, my son!

(Rudyard Kipling)

 

A poem like Kipling’s could provide you with an effective framework—and result in a powerful memoir.

 

Here’s another idea for writing an essay-type memoir: Choose a Bible passage as your structure. For example, each of the Beatitudes could serve as the topic of one chapter:

 

Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.

Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth.

Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled.

Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy.

Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God.

Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God.

Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

(Matthew 5:3-10)

 

Using each Beatitude as a chapter, you can write accounts that illustrate (a) what the Beatitude means and (b) how to live it out in everyday life—chapters about your own experience or about something you’ve witnessed in others.

 

For example, for the first Beatitude, define “blessed.” Explain what Jesus meant by “poor in spirit.” Then write about your own experience of living a poor-in-spirit life—or about someone else who lived such a life, a person who served as a role model for you.

 

Next, define what Jesus meant by “kingdom of heaven” and show what that looks like in the lives of those who are poor in spirit. And then, in good memoir form, conclude by explaining how living according to that verse shaped you into a different person.

 

And then begin writing about the second beatitude. If you continue writing, using the rest of those verses as chapter titles, you can write a whole memoir!

 

 

A good structure can be your friend, your helper.

 

It holds your story together.

 

And it helps readers embrace your messages and lessons.

 

Jon Franklin points out that your memoir, like all quality stories, can teach readers:  “. . . The deeper satisfaction comes when the reader learns with the character [that’s you, the writer]. The reader, like the character, thus becomes a better and wiser person.” (Writing for Story)

 

And that’s what you want, right?

 

Dedicate time to choosing a good structure for your memoir.

Your readers will thank you.

 

Especially for new memoirists: Determine your structure

If you recently started writing your memoir, or plan to begin soon, think about its structure—its framework, its organization.

Structure is important, especially if your memoir is a collection of stories along a specific theme. (Click here to review the definition of memoir. Briefly, it focuses on a segment of your life—a specific theme or time period.)

If you’ve based your memoir on a theme, you’ve probably made a list of stand-alone vignettes that pertain to your theme. You’ve written rough drafts of some of them, and others remain on your to-do list. At this point, you’re working with a collection of loosely related stories.

How will you organize those vignettes—those chapters, those stand-alone accounts—in the best order?

Always keep in mind this desired outcome: You want to hand your readers a coherent, organized, satisfying story.

But sometimes accomplishing that task is easier said than done.

“Most people embarking on writing a memoir are paralyzed by the size of the task,” writes William Zinsser. “What to put in? What to leave out? Where to start? Where to stop? How to shape the story? The past looms over them in a thousand fragments, defying them to impose on it some kind of order. Because of that anxiety, many memoirs linger for years half written, or never written at all.” (How To Write a Memoir; emphasis mine)

Don’t let that happen to you! Make a plan—come up with an arrangement for your stories. Determine the best sequence for them.

Here’s an idea: If you’re writing your memoir about family, group your vignettes according to these topics:

• stories about your sister
• stories about your grandfather
• stories about your cousins
• stories about your grandchildren, etc.

Deciding on your structure can be as easy as that.

Here’s another idea: Choose a poem as your theme and use it to establish your structure.

For example, look at this poem Kathy Pooler wrote. While you read it, take note: Each line could be the topic of a separate chapter.

After the dry cough that lingered,

After that December night of not being able to breathe,

After all those trips to the clinic for chemotherapy,

After the trips to Boston for a stem cell transplant,

After my bald head, covered in hats for each season,

After the nausea, retching and fatigue,

After all those sleepless nights of uncertainty,

After the scans, needle sticks and Neupogen shots…

You held me close and told me I was beautiful and never stopped believing I would recover.

(Kathleen Pooler)

A poem like Kathy’s could provide you with an effective framework (and result in a powerful story).

Here’s yet another idea: Choose a Bible passage as your theme and use its verses as your structure. For example, each of the Beatitudes could serve as the topic of one chapter:

Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.

Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth.

Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled.

Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy.

Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God.

Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God.

Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

(Matthew 5:3-10)

Use each Beatitude as a chapter and write stories that illustrate what it means and how to live it out in everyday life.

For example, for the first Beatitude, define “blessed.” Explain what Jesus meant by “poor in spirit.” Then write one or more accounts about your own experience of living a poor-in-spirit life—or about someone else who lived a poor-in-spirit life and served as a role model for you. Define what Jesus meant by “kingdom of heaven” and show what the kingdom of heaven looks like in the lives of those who are poor in spirit. And then, in good memoir form, conclude by explaining how living according to that verse shaped you into a different person.

And then write about the second Beatitude, and so on. If you continue writing, using the rest of those verses as chapter titles, you can write a whole memoir!

A good structure can be your friend, your helper.

“The structure is the framework you write into,

your security blanket,

your assurance that all your hard work

will result in a completed manuscript.”

(Priscilla Long, The Writer’s Portable Mentor; emphasis mine)

And that’s what you want, right?

Dedicate time to coming up with a good structure.

You’ll be pleased with your finished memoir,

and your readers will thank you.