Back to Basics: Make ‘em laugh

 

“Laughter is a universal language,” writes Chuck Swindoll. “The power of humor to build rapport is . . .  profound. . . . When handled with care, humor will also endear you to your audiences [readers], who will then give you greater access to their hearts.” (Saying it Well: Touching Others with Your Words)

 

You know Chuck’s right. Think back to a time when an author or speaker made you laugh. Charmed you. Beguiled you.

 

The two of you might never have met. Perhaps it was a performer, an athlete, an author, or a conference speaker—but after laughing you felt admiration, maybe even a link. His personality shined through. You enjoyed him. You liked him. You felt like you knew her, approved of her, and would like to spend time with her.

 

Laughter is a bonder, a connector.

Humor offers readers a shared experience.

 

That’s why the “laugh” part of  “Make ‘em cry, make ‘em laugh, make ‘em wait” is important for writers to grasp.

 

Wilkie Collins gets credit for that advice, and writers and speakers follow that for obvious reasons: It keeps audiences engaged.

 

Here’s an example of how humor can endear you to your reader.

 

I once read an article about what could have been a boring subject—a winter squash soup. But the article was no yawner. See for yourself:

 

“I found myself under a misty night sky, the brick patio glistening with rain under the light of the crescent moon. 

 

“I raised a giant Kabocha [squash] over my head, gave out a shriek for good measure and hurled it into the brick. It was primal. . . .

 

“The husk broke loose, and I gathered the sweet orange chunks and returned to my warm kitchen. . . .

 

“There was something exhilarating about starting a pot of autumn soup by howling in the moonlight.” (Betsy Wharton, The Peninsula Daily News)

 

You smiled. I know you did. Some of you even chuckled.

 

You feel you know Betsy, at least a little,

after catching a glimpse of her shrieking

and howling in the moonlight.

 

Humor makes you, the author, feel real to readers.

 

Humor can also lighten the mood during stressful segments of your memoir. When writing about heavy topics—heartbreak, tragedy—humor can give readers a break.

 

Laughter lets readers catch their breath and regroup.

Humor can provide much-needed perspective and balance.

 

In composing my memoir, Grandma’s Letters from Africa, I’d been writing about witnessing (from a distance) inconceivable massacres that raged for months in neighboring African nations.

 

I continued writing about many colleagues who evacuated to Nairobi, Kenya, where my husband and I lived. For months we had prayed for those dear people, housed one of them, and welcomed a couple of them to join us for Christmas.

 

We listened to their stories, wept with them, and welcomed their children to our school.

 

Even though our missionary colleagues evacuated, we agonized over continuing bloodbaths Africans were inflicting upon each other.

 

The daily relentlessness left me numb.

 

Then things got worse.

Violent protests began near our office

and home in Nairobi.

 

Our world was spinning out of control.

 

And right there in the middle of it, I wrote a light-hearted vignette about my midnight fights with mosquitoes—about holding my own mock-violent protest over those most irritating insects in our apartment.

 

My silly little drama didn’t seem out of place in my memoir because that was how real life was happening at the time: In the midst of danger and chaos, wacky incidents popped up. (And I was thankful to laugh about something. Ya can’t cry all the time!) The mosquito vignetted offered a breather to both me, the writer, and my readers.

 

Antoinette Truglio-Martin captured the idea well when she said,

 

“Storytellers need to find  a chuckle

in between the drama and the sobs.”

 

Search for ways to make readers laugh—or giggle, or maybe snicker, or at least smile—in your memoir.

 

• Humor can add much-needed balance, respite from intense chapters in your story. (Click on Lisa Romeo’s post, “How to Add Humor to a Sad Memoir.”)
• It can enliven what could be a less-than-riveting topic, like Betsy Wharton’s cooking squash.
• And it can shine light on your personality and help readers feel connected with you. And that means they’ll be more likely to grasp your memoir’s important lessons and messages.

 

Send us your Christmas stories

Have you written a story about Christmas for your memoir?

If so, send me your Christmas vignette by December 10 and I’ll select one or more to publish here.

Spiff up your rough draft (or start writing it), keeping in mind the definition of memoir (click on What memoir is: Back to basics).

Remember, in writing memoir we go beyond digging up memories. Within our memories, we peel back layers to discover what was going on under the surface. Search for overlooked significance. We work to make sense of what God was doing in and for and through us, and others, at the time—and what it all meant.

“Rather than simply telling a story from her life,

the memoirist both tells the story

and muses upon it,

trying to unravel what it means

in the light of her current knowledge. . . .

The contemporary memoir includes retrospection

as an essential part of the story.

Your reader [is] interested in how you now,

looking back on it,

understand it.”

(Judith Barrington, Writing Memoir)

“The author must impose a coherence

on events he chooses to include

that may not have been present as he lived them. . . .

It’s that selectivity that transforms a memoir

from a report to a reflection

which gives meaning to the events

which might not have been evident to the author

as she lived them.”

(The Author’s DualRole in a Memoir, by Biff Barnes)

  

Capture sweet moments, hilarious events, personality quirks, tragic loss, courageous decisions, integrity, tenacity, or high adventure—all make for great reading.

Helpful tips:

Character development: Each person is complex. Develop your main characters’ shortcomings, redeeming qualities, beliefs, prejudices, body language, tone of voice, attitudes, and quirks.

Was he sentimental or no-nonsense? Comical or dour? Consistent or inconsistent? Gentle or gruff? Did she stand tall or did she slouch? Was he optimistic or pessimistic? Did she stress the importance of table manners? What else was important to him?

picture in public domain

Emotions: Incorporate emotions—about happy, joyful events as well as scary things and grief. Not all stories have happy beginnings or endings.

Allow readers inside your heart and mind.

Include your thoughts—even your struggles—to understand what was happening. Write of your delights as well as your doubts. Ask questions even if you have no answers.

You’ll find tips from Method Writing and from Kathleen Pooler’s post, Evoking Emotions: The power of Sensory Detail in Storytelling.

Also bring in adventure and humor where you can. Click on How to Add Humor to a Sad Memoir, Lisa Romeo’s post about how, why, and where to include humor in a sad memoir.

Sensory details: If you want readers to enjoy your stories, you must include sensory details. Invite them to see, hear, feel, taste, and smell what you experienced so they can enter your story with you.

Don’t miss our earlier posts, December’s Details for Your Memoir as well as Details: A must for your memoir. They’re packed with resources for you.

Your opening: A story’s beginning can make it or break it. It can invite readers in—or send them away. Most writers experiment with many openings before they get just the right one. Spend lots of time on your opening. Some don’t even try to write it until they’ve finished the main body of the story.

Check out these helpful links about writing your vignette’s opening.  (Keep in mind these posts are about crafting the opening of an entire memoir, but they also apply to the opening of chapters/vignettes.)

Links:

Does your beginning pass the test? 

Does your opening make your story a must-read?

Your memoir’s opening—like a Baked Alaska? 

If you don’t get this right, you’ll lose readers

Why should you wait to write your opening?  

People will examine your opening  

I gave the famous author two days to convince me to read her book  

Write your story well  

Spotting major flaws in your opening 

Important: Click on this link to look at

• the importance of creating a sense of place, and
• crafting your story's ending.

Please submit a vignette that

has not been published before, or

 is a story you published in the past 

and it’s copyrighted in your name.

Aim at writing 1000 words or less in a Word document sent as an attachment to LindaKThomasAuthor [at] gmail [dot] com. (Replace [at] with @ and replace [dot] with a period, scrunch everything together, and your email should reach me.) Please write “Christmas vignette for SM 101” in the subject line so I’ll know it’s not spam. Thanks.

Ready, set, go!

Send me your Christmas stories

Have you written a story about Christmas for your memoir?

If so, Gentle Readers, send me your Christmas vignettes between now and December 10 and I’ll select one or more to publish here.

Spiff up your rough draft (or start writing it), keeping in mind the definition of memoir (click on What memoir is: Back to basics).

Here in SM 101, we go beyond digging up memories. Within our memories, we peel back layers to discover what was going on under the surface. Search for overlooked significance. We work to make sense of what God was doing in and for and through us, and others, at the time—and what it all meant.

“Rather than simply telling a story from her life,

the memoirist both tells the story

and muses upon it,

trying to unravel what it means

in the light of her current knowledge. . . .

The contemporary memoir includes retrospection

as an essential part of the story.

Your reader [is] interested in how you now,

looking back on it,

understand it.”

(Judith Barrington, Writing Memoir)

“The author must impose a coherence

on events he chooses to include

that may not have been present as he lived them. . . .

It’s that selectivity that transforms a memoir

from a report to a reflection

which gives meaning to the events

which might not have been evident to the author

as she lived them.”

(The Author’s Dual Role in a Memoir, by Biff Barnes)

  

Capture sweet moments, hilarious events, personality quirks, tragic loss, courageous decisions, integrity, tenacity, or high adventure—all make for great reading.

Helpful tips:

Character development: Each person is complex. Develop your main characters’ shortcomings, redeeming qualities, beliefs, prejudices, body language, tone of voice, attitudes, and quirks.

Was he sentimental or no-nonsense? Comical or dour? Consistent or inconsistent? Gentle or gruff? Did she stand tall or did she slouch? Was he optimistic or pessimistic? Did she stress the importance of table manners? What else was important to him?

Emotions: Incorporate emotions—about happy, joyful events as well as scary things and grief. Not all stories have happy beginnings or endings.

Allow readers inside your heart and mind.

Include your thoughts—even your struggles—to understand what was happening. Write of your delights as well as your doubts. Ask questions even if you have no answers.

You’ll find tips from Method Writing and from Kathleen Pooler’s post, Evoking Emotions: The power of Sensory Detail in Storytelling.

Also bring in adventure and humor where you can. Click on How to Add Humor to a Sad Memoir, Lisa Romeo’s post about how, why, and where to include humor in a sad memoir.

Sensory details: If you want readers to enjoy your stories, you must include sensory details. Invite them to see, hear, feel, taste, and smell what you experienced so they can enter your story with you.

Don’t miss our earlier posts, Your Memoir's December Details, as well as Details: A must for your memoir. They're packed with resources for you.

Your opening: A story’s beginning can make it or break it. It can invite readers in—or send them away. Most writers experiment with many openings before they get just the right one. Spend lots of time on your opening. Some don’t even try to write it until they’ve finished the main body of the story.

Check out these helpful links about writing your vignette’s opening.  (Keep in mind these posts are about crafting the opening of an entire memoir, but they also apply to the opening of chapters/vignettes like you’re writing.)

Links about openings:

Does your beginning pass the test? 

Does your opening make your story a must-read?

Your memoir’s opening—like a Baked Alaska? 

If you don’t get this right, you’ll lose readers

Why should you wait to write your opening?  

People will examine your opening  

I gave the famous author two days to convince me to read her book  

Write your story well 

Spotting major flaws in your opening 

For now, go ahead and work on your rough draft. But come back next week when we’ll look at

• the importance of creating a sense of place, and
• crafting your story’s ending.

Here’s something to keep in mind for the future:

Please submit a vignette that

• has not been published before, or
• is a story you published in the past and it’s copyrighted in your name.

Aim at writing 1000 words or less in a Word document sent as an attachment to LindaKThomasAuthor [at] gmail [dot] com. (Replace [at] with @ and replace [dot] with a period, scrunch everything together, and your email should reach me.) Please write “Christmas vignette for SM 101” in the subject line so I’ll know it’s not spam. Thanks.

Ready, set, go!

P.S. Remember to come back next week

for tips on developing a sense of place for your story

as well as writing its ending.

Send us your stories about mothers and motherhood

Have you written stories about your mother in your memoir? If she died young, did another woman step in to mother you—perhaps an older sister, aunt, stepmother, or grandparent? Do you have a special relationship with your mother-in-law?

Maybe your entire memoir is about that significant mother-figure, or possibly you include short vignettes about her here and there.

Or maybe you’ve written about your life as a new mother, empty-nest mother, stepmother, grandmother, or great-grandmother.

Sweet moments, 

     hilarious events, 

          personality quirks, 

               tragic loss, 

                    courageous decisions, 

                         integrity, 

                              tenacity, 

                                   or high adventure

                                        —all make for great reading.

Here’s an opportunity for you:

Send us one of your vignettes! I’ll share one or more here on SM 101.

For now, spiff up your rough draft. Strive for clarity, fix typos, and make your sentences sing.

Go deep. Go beyond mere memories. Reflect: Look under the surface. Search for overlooked significance. What was God doing at the time? Mine those gems!

“ … The author must impost a coherence

on events he chooses to include

that may not have been present as he lived them….

It’s that selectivity that transforms a memoir

from a report to a reflection

which gives meaning to the events

which might not have been evident to the author

as she lived them.”

(The Author’s Dual Role in Memoir, Biff Barnes)

Write about your delights as well as your doubts. Ask questions even if you have no answers. Include your thoughts—even your struggles—concerning your mother, yourself, and what was happening.

Explore. Untangle. What did you learn about yourself? About mothers? Motherhood? God?

“As memoir writers,” Dr. Linda Joy Myers writes, “we are trying to find a perspective, even forgiveness and compassion, for ourselves and others as we write our stories.”

Helpful Tips:

Click here to review the definition of memoir.

Character development

Each person is complex. Develop your character’s shortcomings, redeeming qualities, beliefs, prejudices, body language, tone of voice, attitudes, and quirks.

Was she sentimental or no-nonsense? Hilarious or dour? Consistent or inconsistent? Gentle or gruff? Did she stand tall or did she slouch? Was she optimistic or pessimistic? Did she stress the importance of table manners? What else was important to her?

Emotions

Incorporate emotions—about both happy, joyful events as well as scary things and grief—not all stories have happy endings.

Bring in adventure and humor where you can. Click on How to Add Humor to a Sad Memoir, Lisa Romeo’s post about how, why, and where to include humor in a sad memoir.

Our earlier post, Method Writing, is a must-read for writing about emotions.

Sensory details

If you want readers to enjoy your stories, you must include sensory details. Invite them to see, hear, feel, taste, and smell what you experienced so they can enter your experience with you.

Don’t miss our earlier post, Details: A must for your memoir. It’s packed with resources for you.

Your opening

A story’s beginning can make it or break it. It can invite readers in—or send them away. Most writers experiment with many openings before they get just the right one. Some don’t even try to write it until they’ve finished the main body of the story.

Helpful links:

Leads, Part 1

Leads, Part 2

Leads, Part 3

Leads, Part 4

Your ending

Pay attention to your story's or your vignette’s conclusion. A weak ending can make a story fall short of its potential impact, but a strong one makes a memoir shine.

Helpful links:

The beauty of memoir: Your vignettes’ strong endings

Maximize the power of your vignettes’ endings

Ready, set, go!

Polish one of your vignettes (let’s say up to 1000 words in length) and send it to us. We’ll publish one or more soon. We’ll give you our email address if you leave a comment below, or on SM 101’s Facebook Page, or send a private message.

Happy writing!