So what?

In writing your memoir, pinpoint the “So what?” of each vignette you write.

Ponder this: Your memoir is about events that impacted you: you lost your job—or landed the job of your dreams; your house burned down; you made the college varsity team; your child died; you survived cancer.

After you’ve written a rough draft of a vignette, ask yourself:

• Why was that event so important to me?
• Why does this memory stand out when I’ve forgotten so many others?
• What is the significance of that experience?

In other words, So what?

That’s what I meant last week when I said memoir involves: 

pondering,

exploring,

unraveling,

reflecting,

examining,

untangling,

mulling over,

analyzing,

musing,

sorting out.

Peel off layers one by one until you can answer these questions:

How do you see the experience now, in retrospect?

What was going on beneath the surface?

How did it change your life?

And, if your memoir has a spiritual dimension, how was God:

orchestrating,

managing,

directing,

holding the reins,

choreographing,

and arranging the details,

to carry out His best plans for your life?

Connect the dots: To what new place did God lead you? How did He shake you up, change your mind, melt your heart, revise your goals, and make a new person of you?

“Many memoir writers in workshops I’ve taught,” writes Victoria Costello, “encounter trouble with the reflective voice.… If this is a stumbling block for you, here are some phrases that can help ease you into a reflective voice:

• There must have been…
• Only later did I realize…
• There was no way to know then…
• The way I see it now…
• It has taken me 10, 20, 30 years to understand that…”

(The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Writing a Memoir)

Search your heart

for the deeper lessons

within your stories.

Only then can you pass on

those deeper lessons

to your readers.