“A recent blog on Spiritual Memoirs 101 dealt with the topic
of writing through pain. I’m confident every reader snapped to full attention
because each one of us could write volumes on pain, heartache and tribulation.
Such is the path through a fallen world,” writes Catherine P. Downing, author
of her new memoir, Sparks of Redemptive Grace.
Since we received several poignant responses
from readers
about that post,
I invited Catherine to write a guest post
for you today. She continues:
I get a sense of how relevant and meaningful my book is to
readers by the growing number of people writing reviews. Their words cluster
around three basic themes.
First, reviewers make note of the pain through words/phrases like “dark places,” “shattered dreams,”
“heartache” and “grieving.”
Secondly, they express appreciation for the honesty: “transparent,” “intimate,”
realistic” and “candor.”
The third theme I read in the reviews is one of hope—which is one of two objectives I
had in writing the book. My purposes were: 1) to give hope and strengthen the faith
of others walking a similar path, as well as 2) to help family and friends
around them understand their
struggles.
Reviews like the following give me a glimpse of the hope and help people are finding as they read it:
- “I
was richly, deeply blessed and inspired by this book. But not inspired to smile
and pour another cup of coffee. Inspired to love with greater fervor, to pray
for eyes that see more clearly, and then to do something with what I see,
because there are needs everywhere, there's brokenness everywhere.” –Amazon
- “I
read a lot of devotional books and commentaries on the Scriptures. I can't
remember when an author has sorted out an issue or topic for me more powerfully
than this one.” –Amazon
- “This
little gem of a book has encouraged me to stop looking for the way OUT of
difficult situations, and to look, instead, for the treasures waiting to be
mined in the darkness.” –Amazon
- “In
these few pages, Downing beautifully intertwines information with inspiration,
and insight with encouragement, leaving the reader with a gut-wrenching hope
and a hunger to know the God she does.” –Advanced Praise
How was the book able to capture the pain through the lens
of transparency and hope? I don't have a formula, but here are some things that
seemed to help.
- It
was written under a pseudonym. This was done to give a layer of privacy to our
family, which in turn gave me courage to be vulnerable.
- Each
chapter follows the same pattern: quote, narrative, scripture, prayer. This set
a cadence to the reading.
- Each
chapter is short, and I limited the number of chapters. This gives the reader
space to breathe amid the heaviness. As one reviewer wrote in her advanced
praise: “It only takes an hour to read ... but don’t rush it. Savor it.
Meditate on it. Pray through it. And then share it with others.”
- Each
chapter ends with a carefully penned prayer, which serves as a summary of the
chapter. These highlight my recognition of my own limitations and confidence in
our always-faithful God. People tell me the prayers are their favorite part. One reviewer mentioned on Amazon, "The prayers written at the end of each chapter are so well crafted that I will be using them to enhance my own prayer life and I will quote from them as I lead devotions on the related passages."
- I was able to write this book at this stage of my life, and not earlier, because I have learned to be deliberate to tend to my own wounds. Though the painful life circumstances are current and real, I maintain an emotional, spiritual and mental regimen that enables me to reflect on our journey from a posture of health and hope, and not oozing from open sores.
The Spiritual Memoirs 101 blog points out that writing about our pain points can be cathartic. Readers likewise assume that writing the book was helpful to me in the healing process. For me the writing really didn't have that function. Our journey has been long and I've lamented the hardships and sorrows as they've happened; so for me there wasn't a bottled-up ocean of pain looking for a rocky shore where the waves could break. Instead it was more like cooking a Thanksgiving meal that was being prepared for the desperately hungry and offered as a ministry.
In writing the book, my hope was that it would help others navigate through their own pain and show them how to build a lifeboat to carry them to a harbor of hope. Guiding thoughts were:
How can I recount the moments
when God's redemptive grace
broke through the darkness
so that in their own despair
readers can see sparks of light?
How might God bless and break
the bread of our story
to distribute it as nourishment
to those who have lost sight
of the Father's presence?
In the end, I believe
this is the point of writing
about the hardships of life:
that while the story is about us,
it is really about the readers;
and while the focus is on our pain,
it is really about the Healer.
I'll close with this warning from the last chapter of my little book. I think it captures the biggest challenge in writing about our sufferings:
There is a cliff I walk along while trying to stay well away from the edge, and in writing these pages I have been very aware of its nearness. I have tried to stay on the narrow path between detached realism and narcissistic drama, for I know well that self-pity is a dangerous precipice and those who fall in often do not come back up.
As you consider being transparent about your experiences in your spiritual memoirs, may the One who turned water into wine take your pain and transform it into a balm to soothe others."
Catherine P. Downing
www.sparksofredemptivegrace.com
https://www.facebook.com/sparksofredemptivegrace
https://www.amazon.com/Sparks-Redemptive-Grace-Seeking-Illness/dp/057817717X
If you missed the recent blog post Catherine mentions, click on Writing yourself to the other side of pain.
