Your vignettes about growing old can be among your most
powerful stories. I encourage you to include several in your memoir—your own
stories or those of others. (If you missed Part 1 about growing old, click on
this link:
Growing old: the silly side.)
Now, your readers might assume an elderly person is a
feeble, tired, out-of-date fuddy duddy, but don’t let them get away with that!
You have this opportunity to educate younger generations
about old-timers. Life for all generations can be better if you share your
wisdom and insights.
One of the best ways of doing that, or maybe the best way,
is to start with humor, something light-hearted, funny, amusing …
Something like this tall tale:
Two old women were sitting on a park bench outside a town
hall where a flower show was in progress.
One lady leaned over and said to the other, “Life is so
boring. We never have fun anymore. For five dollars, I’d take off my clothes
and streak through that flower show.”
“You’re on!” laughed the woman, holding up a five dollar
bill.
The first little old lady wiggled out of her clothes and,
naked, streaked through the front door of the flower show.
From outside, her friend heard a commotion inside the hall,
and then applause.
In a few moments the naked woman burst through the door
surrounded by a cheering crowd.
“What happened?” asked her curious friend.
“I won First Prize for Best Dried Arrangement.”
(author unknown)
When you start with humorous stories, you do more than
entertain:
- Humor gets your readers’
attention: it pulls them in and keeps them reading.
- It connects your readers
with you.
- It can gain readers’
admiration and acceptance.
- Humor endears you to your
readers.
- Funniness makes you seem
real. You are no longer a vague author lurking in shadows. Instead, your
reader has spent a happy time with you and feels like he knows you and, as
a result, he likes you. He wants to know you better.
- Laughter is a universal
language, a common connector, a shared experience.
- Humor lets you and your
readers tackle the elephant in the room.
What is that elephant in the room? It’s the issues no one’s
talking about (at least not to your face; they might, however, talk about them
behind your back).
Here’s the elephant in the room:
When you grow old, your body is no longer young and firm, your
hair grays, your face wrinkles, your neck skin droops and wobbles, your hand
shakes, your mind forget things, and your balance isn’t as good as it used to
be. You are considered undependable, if not downright dangerous, and they take
away your car. Some day you’re going to die. You’ll be dead. Until then, your
physical and mental health will continue to deteriorate. You’ll start to smell
bad. You could end up dependent upon others to feed you, bathe you, dress you,
brush your teeth, and carry out all your personal needs. It’s not pretty. In
fact, some people consider it disgusting.
That’s the elephant in the room.
Humor, however, lets you acknowledge the obvious. It brings sensitive
issues out of the darkness and into the light. It offers your readers a look at
realities through fresh eyes.
And then something lovely can happen: Looking at aging in a humorous
way can soothe tension and soften uneasiness younger people might feel. Humor
can make old people appear less alien, not as weird and creepy as the younger
generation thought. The experience helps them realize they don’t need to
distance themselves from old-timers.
Looking at aging in a light-hearted way can also reinforce
this truth: Aging is natural. It can help younger generations accept aging as a
normal part of life that even they will experience. Chuck Swindoll says it this
way: “… The story gives them permission to laugh at the struggles that every
[person] inevitably faces.…” (Touching Others With Your Words)
Since aging is a normal part of life, oldsters might as well
enjoy it! Make the most of it!
When you share stories about the funny side of old age, your
message is something like this: I know I’m old, but it’s not a failure on my
part—it’s a natural part of the cycle of life. It happens to everyone, so I
choose to see the glass half full, not half empty. I’m making the best of my
situation. I’m enjoying life as much as I can.
This next little
story sheds light on another reality: Elderly people have Senior Moments. But
hey, that, too, is a natural part of life! We might as well acknowledge it with
light-heartedness.
An elderly lady did her shopping and, upon returning to her
car, found four men in the act of stealing it.
She dropped her shopping bags, drew her handgun, and
screamed, "I have a gun, and I know how to use it! Get out of the
car!"
The men jumped out and ran for their lives.
The lady, shaken, loaded her shopping bags into the car and
sat down in the driver's seat, but she was so flustered she couldn’t get her
key into the ignition. She tried and tried, and then, slowly, it
dawned on her. She jumped out of the car and grabbed her bags.
A few minutes later, she found her car parked a few spaces
down the aisle. She loaded her bags, drove to the police station, and turned
herself in. The sergeant couldn't stop laughing.
He pointed to the other end of the counter where four pale men were reporting a
carjacking by a mad, elderly woman described as white, less than five feet
tall, glasses, curly white hair, and carrying a large handgun.
No charges were filed. (author unknown)
Like Chuck Swindoll says, "Humor makes difficult truths easier to accept."
Your task: Challenge your readers’ preconceived notions of
being old. Shake ‘em up a bit.
Looking at old age in a light-hearted way, oldsters and the
youngsters together, lets everyone breathe easier. It defuses, it disarms, it helps
remove mysteries. It eases awkwardness younger generations probably feel, and
can make way for compassion and respect.
I encourage you to write a few vignettes about aging. By
starting with one or more humorous stories, you establish a connection with
your readers, and, of great importance: you make it possible to be heard later.
(More on that next week.)
