Tuesday, October 25, 2022

Back to the Basics: Why should you write your memoir?

 

A couple of years ago, I wrote a blog post after I attended the first meeting of our church’s fall book club, for which they’d chosen my new memoir, Please, God, Don’t Make Me Go: A Foot-Dragger’s Memoir.  I was happy but also humbled that they chose it.

                                                                                                                                     

Among other questions, they asked me: Why did you write your memoir?

 

Good question.

 

I took time to answer because a memoir—every memoircan and should be a gift for its readers. In fact:

 

I believe God Himself

dreamed up the idea of memoirs.

If you think that’s a stretch, read on!

 

That evening, I took the ladies back to the beginning of my passion for memoirs—though originally I didn’t even know the definition of “memoir.”

 

It started some thirty years ago. I’d been reading Streams in the Desert, a devotional from 1925 (!) by Mrs. Charles E. Cowman (though nowadays they call her L. B. Cowman).

 

Not only have publishers updated her powerful devotional by letting the dear lady use her own name instead of her husband’s, they’ve also updated the wording and Bible version.

 

But I’m still using the old-fashioned version, so keep that in mind when you read what L.B. wrote. It’s based on Luke 21:13 which says, “This will give you an opportunity to tell about Me” (ERV).

 

Life is a steep climb,

and it does the heart good to have somebody ‘call back

and cheerily beckon us on up the high hill.

We are all climbers together, and we must help one another.”

L.B.Cowman

 

“This mountain climbing is serious business, but glorious,” she wrote. “It takes strength and steady step to find the summits. The outlook widens with the altitude. If anyone among us has found anything worthwhile, we ought to ‘call back.’”

 

And then L.B. Cowman shares her poem:

 

If you have gone a little way ahead of me, call back

‘Twill cheer my heart and help my feet along the stony track;

And if, perchance, Faith’s light is dim, because the [lamp] oil is low,

Your call will guide my lagging course as wearily I go.

 

Call back, and tell me that He went with you into the storm;

Call back, and say He kept you when the forest’s roots were torn;

That, when the heavens thundered and the earthquake shook the hill,

He bore you up and held you where the very air was still.

 

. . . But if you’ll say He heard you when your prayer was but a cry,

And if you’ll say He saw you through the night’s sin-darkened sky—

If you have gone a little way ahead, oh, friend, call back—

‘Twill cheer my heart and help my feet along the stony track.

 

That poem—

that thought of cupping our hands around our mouths

and cheering on others

who are coming behind us, struggling up life’s steep trails—

that thought zinged me.

It zapped me.

“Yesssss!” I said.

 

I fought tears when I thought of the people

who had already battled up life’s steep mountain trails,

who then turned to me to show by their example

how to choose courage and faith,

those who shared with me their words,

who cheered me on and kept praying.

 

My heart lurches when I think how my life’s battles

might have turned out

if those dear souls had not told me their story

they and their stories

kept me pounding one foot in front of the other,

hoping, believing, refusing to give up

because if God had helped them, He’d help me, too.

 

When I first read L.B. Cowman’s devotional that day, I told myself: “A Call Back book! That’s what we need—to share our stories and keep each other fighting the good fight.”

 

Reading that poem was a defining moment for me. For years I thought about a Call Back Book. But the idea was raw and rough. It needed to marinate for a few years.

 

Fast forward twenty years or so. I came upon the following words (words which you know well if you’ve been with our SM 101 tribe for a while):Always remember—and never forget—what you’ve seen God do and be sure to tell your children and grandchildren (Deuteronomy 4:9).

 

When I read those words, they gave me another zing and zap. That was another pivotal moment for me. “That’s it!” I told myself. “That’s what a Call Back Book would accomplish.” My undeveloped concept began to take a more solid form in my mind and heart and vision.

 

And the fact that God told us to tell our stories

to our kids and grandkids

Wow again! He commanded us to tell our stories.

 

It’s a calling He’s given all of us.

A ministry, not a hobby.

 

I remember asking myself, “I wonder what a memoir is.” I looked up the definition and—Wow again. Memoir was a perfect format for telling our stories. (Click here for the definition of memoir.)

 

And, as they say, the rest is history:


Fast forward to that evening at our church’s Book Club meeting when they were reading my memoir. I was in for a delightful surprise. The ladies started discussing the definition of memoir, and then they realized that each of them had a story.

 

They caught the vision of the importance of telling their stories.

 

In the words of Lloyd John Ogilvie, “ “. . . we can be God’s tap on a person’s shoulder. . . . It’s awesome to realize that God can use us as His messengers, healers, and helpers. He’s up to exciting things, and all He needs is a willing, receptive, and obedient spirit” (Silent Strength for My Life).

 

If you’re writing your memoir,

YOU are those Ogilvie writes about—

YOU are the ones with a willing,

receptive, and obedient spirit.

 

How awesome to realize that

God is using YOU as His messengers,

healers, and helpers.




 

Tuesday, October 18, 2022

Back to basics: What is a Memoir?

 

If you’re thinking about writing a memoir, you need to know the definition of “memoir.”

 

And if you’re already writing your story, sometimes you need to remind yourself what a memoir is. This helps focus correctly and work efficiently.

 

A memoir is so much more than spinning yarns and telling tales.

 

Since there’s some confusion about the genre of memoir, let’s pin down what it is not: Memoir is not journaling. A journal is private—for your eyes only—but you write a memoir for others to read.

 

A memoir is not an autobiography. An autobiography documents your whole life beginning with the day you were born, but a memoir focuses on one segment of your life—(1) a specific theme or (2) a time period, a slice of life.


 

You can write a memoir based on a theme—for example, the theme of working as a seamstress in Asia, or a food vender at Seattle’s T-Mobile Park, or a stepmother to six kids. 

 

Focus on only that theme, leaving out other topics—such as the fact that you might be friends with a famous movie producer, or that you worked at an animal shelter your first year after college.

 

Or you can write a memoir based on a time period. My first memoir, Grandma’s Letters from Africa, covers my first four years in Africa. My second memoir, Please, God, Don’t Make Me Go: A Foot-Dragger's Memoir, focuses on three years in South America.

 

Another person’s time period might be his teenage years, or the years following a spouse’s death, or service in the Peace Corps. We focus only on that slice of our lives and leave out other topics.

 

We include only those details that pertain to our chosen window of time or our memoir’s theme.

 

Personal reflection is a key ingredient in memoir. Remember that. Most of us need to work on understanding what reflection is because, as Richard Foster observes, “The sad truth is that many authors simply have never learned to reflect substantively on anything.”

 

So, memoirists reflect in a deliberate way:

 

You look back,

peel away layers,

excavate,

find the gems.

Dig them out in pieces if you must, 

but dig them out.

Inspect.

Examine those gems,

ponder their deeper meaning.

Spend as much time as you need 

to make sense of what you discover.

Uncover the deeper, higher, wider, richer story.

 

In the past you might have overlooked something of the utmost importance, so make time to search for those profound lessons—insights, healing, blessings—in the events of your life.

 

In the process, you might need to do a “Doggie Head Tilt,” a phrase Michael Metzger coined. “If your head never tilts,” he says, “your mind never changes.” True!

 

In the process of reflecting, answer these questions:

  • What new things have I learned about myself because of the key events of my life?
  • What new things did I learn about significant people in my life? About God?
  • How have these discoveries made me into a different, better person?

 

Not all memoirs include a spiritual dimension.

 

But if you are writing a spiritual memoir, keep this in mind: It does not require that you have exceptional, supernatural religious stories to write about, stories that would make the evening news and get tweeted around the world. Instead, look for ways God was involved in your everyday life.

 

You don’t have to write about God in every chapter. Whether you realized it at the time or not, He was with you, busy working out His good plans for His children—and from time to time in your stories you can spell out what He was doing. And do so in a winsome way, rather than sounding holier-than-thou.

 

Jesus said,

“Go tell your family everything God has done for you”

(Luke 8:39).

 

Write your memoirs!