How can you speak the truth in love in your memoir?

Sometimes God calls us to take a stand, to take a risk, to confront the elephant in the room. What needs to change in your family? your workplace? your community? your church? your city? your nation? your world?

Dear Chuck Swindoll writes, “All over this world, around us every day, are people who are looking for the truth to be lived out. . . . There are people watching you. . . . Remember, you are here by God's appointment, you are in His keeping, you are under His training, for His time.” 

Chuck's words remind me of a recent blog post in which I suggested that we memoirists can—sometimes we must—use our voices to make a difference. I wrote about Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., and of the Old Testament woman, Esther, and of a young boy named Hayden. (To read that post, click on On authoring change: Break the silence with your memoir.)

And in the memoir class I’ve been leading, we talked about speaking the truth in love, speaking truth to power, and the correct way to go about it.

Then on Sunday, my son-in-law’s sermon touched on the same topic. Brian said that when Jesus spoke, sometimes he stirred up animosity and resentment, even among his disciples once in a while. (See Mark 6:1-3 and Luke 4:28-29.)

Brian also pointed out that despite the tension Jesus created when he spoke the truth, he also was a man who attracted others, who offered healing and life. He sent his disciples to speak the truth but also to be appealing to others and bring restoration and hope.

Jesus and his disciples lived out that tension, and you and I are called to do the same. He calls us to tell the truth and at the same time serve others in love.

Here’s the hard part: We need to resist being obnoxious and abrasive. We’re to offer others a message of encouragement, to share the truth thoughtfully, gently, compassionately, and winsomely. And we need to extend grace to others because we all need to grow and change and mature. Nobody's perfect. 

“As a change agent, how do you

turn your dream of making a positive

and meaningful difference in the world into a reality?

You author change.

You write and publish a book

that inspires positive action or change

in individuals, communities,

organizations, or the world at large.

The world needs change agents.

It’s your time to make a positive and meaningful impact

with your words.”

(Nina Amir)

Perhaps you’ve cracked open an issue and sorted through it and have come to a clarity others haven’t yet. Take action. Speak up. WRITE.

Make a difference.

Invite others to re-think

their assumptions and conclusions.

Your memoir could help right a wrong.

It could trigger much-needed change and healing.

God could use your story

to give hope and courage to others—

perhaps it could even

make all the difference in one person’s life.

Lloyd Ogilvie penned this perfect prayer for memoirists and those who sense a need to speak up:

“Father . . . bless me with Your Spirit so that

I may disagree without being disagreeable,

share my convictions without being contentious,

and lift up truth without putting others down.

Help me to seek to convince without coercion,

persuade without power moves,

motivate without manipulation.”

(Lloyd John Ogilvie, Quiet Moments with God)

On authoring change: Break the silence with your memoir

This week, as we remember Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., and take inspiration from him, we must ask ourselves: How can we—how must we—use our voices to make a difference?

Our memoirs could spark changes that impact others—not just today but long after our days on earth are no more.

What is God calling you to write in your memoir? What needs to change in your life? your family? your workplace? your community? your church? your city? your nation? your world?

When you think about taking a stand, sticking your neck out, and speaking up, it's easy to come up with a long list of reasons to remain silent.

But Dr. King, who lived out and spoke up about principles the Bible teaches, didn’t choose the easy, safe, comfortable, convenient path. My friend Brian Carroll said this yesterday of Dr. King: “He was a statesman, a leader, a servant of the people, precisely because he radically spoke the whole truth.”

“The ultimate measure of a man,” Dr. King said, “is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at moments of challenge and controversy. The true neighbor will risk his position, his prestige, and even his life for the welfare of others. In dangerous valleys and hazardous pathways, he will lift some bruised and beaten brother to a higher and more noble life.”

Chuck Swindoll writes about a few people who took a stand and changed history: “Only one missionary invests his whole life in a remote area, and an entire tribe is ultimately evangelized. Only one statesman stands for right, and a country is saved. Only one strong-willed and determined citizen says, 'I stand against this evil,' and a community ramps up morally and changes its direction.”

And then Swindoll writes of another who perhaps served as a role model for Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., a woman who knew that doing the right thing might result in her death:

“And only one woman decided it was worth the risk to break with protocol and speak her mind, and a nation was preserved . . . [from] the worst kind of holocaust. . . . In [God's] sovereign plan, He determined that one person could make the difference. One individual would stand in the gap. Her name is Esther [in the Old Testament].” (Great Days with the Great Lives, Chuck Swindoll) 

Sabina Nawaz, in her post, “Rethink Courageous Leadership,” writes this about Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. “For me, King is synonymous with courage. Which got me to thinking: yes, it takes courage to inspire others, but we often misunderstand the kind of courage it takes to lead. The courage to lead does not just involve a bold, public-facing bravery, but also a quieter, more introspective kind of courage.”

Nawaz writes of “a thousand smaller acts of bravery” Dr. King took which enabled him to later carry out his huge, history-making acts of courage.

You and I will not go down in history as exceptional leaders, but that’s no reason to remain silent. We can stand up to what’s wrong by carrying out our own small acts of bravery—in our memoirs, for example.

Nawaz suggests that as we gain inspiration from people like MLK, we should look at them “from a fresh perspective and think not about the grand, daring acts but about the small heroic moments” of those courageous leaders. When we do, we can gain courage to carry out our own small, heroic acts of courage.

You’ll enjoy this example of just such a small, heroic moment:

It’s the story of a young high school boy named Hayden who took a stand.

It was See You at the Pole day, an annual student-led event, a gathering around the flag before school when students pray for their families, friends, schools, teachers, and country.

Hayden was the first to arrive, but he knew other students would soon arrive, so he stood there alone. Praying.

Before long, he realized no one else was coming. But he stayed there anyway and prayed, asking God to use his aloneness to reach those passing by.

And the community noticed. The kid’s story went viral on Facebook. People who didn’t know Hayden or his family, even people who professed no faith, praised the young man for standing there alone.

At home after school, Hayden and his mom scrolled through hundreds of comments people left, evidence that God had answered his prayers that morning. “It’s crazy,” Hayden said, laughing, “because it’s like he answered in this big way!”

In “The Boy Who Stood at the Flag Pole Alone,” Hayden’s mom, Stacey Philpot, wrote these bracing words to people like you and me:

“So to you, wherever it is in your life you stand alone, be it a flag pole or a marriage, a place of work or a seemingly impossible situation, I believe my son would like to remind you God can do big things with your standing alone. Perhaps, for now, you are praying until someone else shows up or takes notice. God sees, he knows, and he can do big things.”

Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., said:

“Our lives begin to end the day

we become silent about things that matter.”

He also said:

“The time is always right to do what is right.”

Nina Amir asks:

“As a change agent, how do you

turn your dream of making a positive

and meaningful difference in the world into a reality?

You author change.

You write and publish a book

that inspires positive action or change

in individuals, communities,

organizations, or the world at large.

The world needs change agents.

It’s your time to make a positive and meaningful impact

with your words.”

(Nina Amir)

Perhaps you’ve cracked open an issue and sorted through it

and have come to a clarity others haven’t yet.

Take action. Speak up. WRITE.

Make a difference.

Invite others to re-think

their assumptions and conclusions.

Your memoir could help right a wrong.

It could trigger much-needed change and healing.

God could use your story

to give hope and courage to others—

perhaps it could even

make all the difference in one person’s life.