Beyond likeable: Worthy

In addition to crafting well-rounded, relatable, realistic, fleshed-out, believable characters in our memoirs (click here if you missed our recent post), Angela Ackerman asks a thought-provoking question: Will Writers Find Your Protagonist Worthy?

Her post challenged me to re-examine main characters in a memoir I’m writing. Her insights will be valuable to you, too, as you write your memoir.

Angela asks if our readers will consider our key people “worth rooting for.”

You and I need to discover the “true worthiness” of our key figures and then find words to describe them.

“True worthiness” is more than being nice or charming or attractive or accomplished or likeable. It’s higher and deeper and wider than those.

Such worthiness has to do with a person’s moral code, principles, standards, beliefs, ideals, values, and ethics.

I’m not necessarily talking about prominent, recognized, lauded people.

Think about this: In most cases, your heroes and mine are everyday common people, living quiet, private lives, maybe even mundane lives.

You and I have the task of showing

how those ordinary unsung heroes

came into our lives

and led us,

cheered for us,

steered us away from foolishness,

prayed for us,

cried with us,

laughed with us,

(and sometimes laughed at us),

changed us,

showed us how to live

and love

and work

and worship.

They modeled integrity

and honor

and faithfulness

and commitment,

and we memoirists

need to flesh out those people

and develop those key characters in our stories

so readers feel they know them

and “find them worthy of rooting for.”

Look over the main personalities in your memoir—not all people, only key figures.

If you haven’t read your rough drafts for a while, you’ll be able read with fresh eyes and ears (yes, read them aloud). Put yourself in your readers’ shoes while you read your drafts and ask yourself if your key figures are “worthy of rooting for.” If not, spend time developing your heroes.

Pull back the layers

and dig deeply,

all the while asking yourself

what experiences, choices,

values, beliefs, 

and/or people

made them into the persons they became?

Get out your magnifying glass.

Then make those characters come alive!

Enable your readers to discover

and appreciate

your real heroes.

The end result

will be worth your time and effort.

Your memoir and the importance of EMPATHY

You, as a memoirist, want to write about people that “readers bond with and root for,” writes Angela Ackerman, “and this happens because of one very important word: EMPATHY.”

“When characters are unique yet well-rounded and familiar in some way, we connect with them,” Angela continues. “We empathize with what they are going through, become tense when trouble hits, and relax when they emerge in one piece. We care about what happens to them because our emotions are engaged.”

You and I, as memoirists, have a big responsibility: to create realistic, fleshed-out main characters in our stories—not all the people, but central figures. Our job: craft believable individuals.

The stars of our narratives, the heroes, need to have:

• personality,
• quirks,
• depth,
• blind spots,
• complexity,
• obsessions,
• talents,
• weaknesses,
• inconsistencies,
• successes,
• and failures.

What trait is most prominent? His worst trait? Her most endearing trait?

What is his passion? What are her life’s goals? Did he drop out of high school to fight in World War 2? Does she have her PhD?

We pinpoint what makes these details unique within the context of our lives and stories. If she’s wealthy, or if he’s just barely scraping by—and if that is significant info for our readers—then we include it.

We use all five senses to round out our main characters. We let readers see, smell, hear, feel, and taste what we experienced with our heroes.

Does she usually smell like lilacs? Or garlic? Does he have red hair and freckles? Does she have dark skin and white hair? Does he smell like coal because he works in a coal mine? Do you wish he used deodorant? Are her hands soft and well-groomed, or are they rough and chapped? What does his voice sound like? Is she cute as a bug’s ear? Does he have a birth defect? Does he wear too much aftershave? Is she super-organized? Is he sloppy?

We want our readers to feel they know our main characters and can relate to them, care about them.

Analyze and then include your main characters’ body language: “Sometimes what people say without actually speaking tells us a whole lot more than what comes out of their mouths,” writes Melissa Donovan at Writing Forward blog. “Using body language to communicate is natural. We all understand it intuitively.… [C]losely observe people’s body language and learn how humans speak without words so you can bring unspoken communication into your writing.”

Our readers want to enter our stories with us. They want to identify with us, bond, cry, laugh, worry, and hang in there with us all the way to the end.  

You’ll enjoy reading more about creating empathy through action, a person’s flaws, self-doubts, and mistakes in Angela’s post, “3 Quick Tips To Help Readers Connect To Your Hero.” (Keep in mind the post is about developing fictitious characters, but Angela’s tips are important for real people in your memoir. Just be sure you’re honest and accurate in fleshing out your real person!)

Again: Include only those details that are unique within the context of your stories. If a bit of description is significant info for your readers, include it.

More next week on fleshing out our main characters.